The Toxic Avenger Unrated

This doesnt start well, indeed after about ten minutes I thought it was just going to be Tyrion Lannister does Bruce Banner. Well I was quite pleasantly surprised as it takes those foundations and, with its tongue firmly implanted in its cheek, and with him suitably armed with his newly radioactive mop, we set off on a crime caper with a difference. Kevin Bacons Bob Garbinger runs a big chemical company that routinely churns out enough gunge into the rivers and streams of the city to give Julia Roberts and Albert Finney enough work for a lifetime. Winston (Peter Dinklage) is trying to rear teenage stepson Wade (Jacob Tremblay) whilst holding down a menial job in one of those plants. When he gets a terrible diagnosis from his doctor, he thin...

My quick rating - 7.0/10. Somewhere in the cosmic video store of nostalgia, my 12-year-old self just did a cartwheel in parachute pants. I grew up rewinding the original Toxic Avenger on worn-out VHS until the tracking lines looked like snowstorms over Tromaville. So when Hollywood whispered remake, I braced myself for PG-13 sterilization and emotional damage. But bless Macon Blairs radioactive hearthe didnt just do it justice, he hosed it down in glowing sludge and handed it a mop.

Our new hero is Winston Gooze (Peter Dinklage), a terminally ill janitor who gets baptized in toxic goop and comes out looking like a meatball with abs and a Costco-sized case of trauma. Dinklage doesnt just play Toxie, he owns him. He swings that glowing mop...