Cockneys vs Zombies

Andy and Terry Macguire (Harry Treadaway, Fish Tank & Rasmus Hardiker, Saxondale) are two cockney orphan tearaways. They're a little bit wooah, a little bit wheeey. But like all cockney orphan tearaways who are a little bit wooah, a little bit wheeey, they've got an 'eart o' gold, and they want to save their grandad's (Alan "Brick-Top" Ford, stealing the film) retirement home from imminent closure. How? By nicking a van that barely works, assembling a team made up of themselves, their sexy cousin (Michelle Ryan, EastEnders) and a pair of associates: the dimwitted Tuppence (Jack Doolan, The Green Green Grass) and the psychotic Mental Mickey (Ashley "Bashy" Thomas, apparently something of a name in the UK "Grime" scene which spawned Tinie Tem...

What a bloody stupid/brilliant film! It does exactly what you'd expect, really. Doesn't outstay its welcome though, unlike some, providing a delightfully silly romp around East London's undead-infested streets. Some crackin' one-liners, intriguing and relatable characters, and a few "ooooh, hot DAMN!" moments. Given the original intention and audience expectation, this is spot on. How could you walk away without a big cheesy grin?! Love it!

I've always had a soft spot for the Treadaway twins but even here, with Alan Ford doing his best Albert Finney impersonation as dad "Ray", this struggles to resonate. It's Harry ("Andy") and his best mate "Terry" (Rasmus Hardiker) who decide to assemble a gang to rob a bank. Ashley Thomas provides the muscle as the aptly named "Mental Mickey" and Michelle Ryan's "Katy" ain't no slouch either as their plans gradually take shape. What they don't account for, though, is the zombification of East London. Whether or not they successfully pull off their heist and avoid the police is secondary to their escaping an army of spellbound critters who have been bitten after an ancient graveyard was accidentally uncovered by a construction operation. Now...